I am the mother of a one year old toddler *drops dead*

Evelynn is one year old today.  Holy shit.  I don't know how to feel about it sometimes.  At times I feel overwhelmed.  There were times when I wasn't sure we were going to make it to this point.  I wonder if that was a new mom thing or a NICU baby thing?  I just can't believe a year has gone by.  Like my Dad said "time flies when your having fun", so true.  I can't wait to celebrate her birthday with all of our family and friends who really helped not only bring her into this world, but helped everyday with making her the best she can be, and alternately helping us be the best we can be as parents. 
Thank you everyone.  From the bottom of our hearts.

And now on a different topic. 
How can I clean up baby poop and vomit and God knows what else, but when it comes to anything involving the cats bodily fluids, I can't handle it.  Neither can Seth.  For some reason, Bagheera has been throwing up.  I'm pretty sure its the cheap food I've been feeding him (WHAT I HAD A COUPON!)  But he is just going to have to suffer until I get thru the four bags I got.  He doesn't have to eat the dry food.  He can get the three hundred treats I have or the fancy wet food that I give him everyday.  (And trust, he reminds me EVERY DAY that he needs it)  Anyway long story short, for the last three days I've been cleaning up cat barf.  Also because Seth has been uber busy with work, I've been responsible, for my own sanity, with scooping the cat pooper.  I say my own sanity because I hate walking around my house going "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SMELL??" all day and then having Seth go "I don't know, I can't smell anything." or Evelyn just stare at me blankly as if to say "if it was me, you would know it".  So the first thing I do is check the garbage because we got these new bags from Sam's Club that aren't worth a shit. (It really pisses me off.  They were the exact same bags we always grab from Sam's, but for some reason they changed them and now they are complete crap.  And I only have about five thousand more bags to get rid of before I can get new ones.)  Then I check under the couches and pick up Evelynn's toys in case there is some errant food left behind (there usually is) and then, if all else fails, I scoop the cat pan.
And I gag.  I gag the whole time.  My eyes water because I'm gagging.  Retching.  Coming thisclose to vomiting all over.  What the hell.  I don't breathe out of my mouth in fear of spilling my guts everywhere. 
So last night, we heard the tell tell "huuuuuughgghghgh" and I made Seth go look.   Bagheera had barfed on the stairs.  To his credit, he doesn't barf on the carpet.  Usually a surface I can clean up.  Thanks Bags.
So this is how the conversation went:
Seth: Yeah he barfed, its everywhere *retches* oh I can't handle it.
Me: You can't handle it?  This is like the third pile I will have picked up today.  (a slight exaggeration)
Seth: *gets grump* fine.
Me: Okay if I clean it up, I get to take a bath, uninterrupted, no guilt.
Seth: (too quickly) fine, yes!
Me: Shit.

So then I pick it up.  And while I am swiping the squish grossness under a paper towel while wearing some gloves I stole from the ER while Evelynn was there (What?  If you had seen how much they charged us for leaving us alone in a room for two hours you would have stole everything in sight too, I was nervous and angry) I just started throwing up into the bag of throw up.  It was so horrible. 
But I got a long bath out of the deal.
If I had to do it all over again, I probably would.

So I'm off to enjoy a hopefully barf free day with my ONE YEAR OLD DAUGHTER.  *gulp*

Love (my birthday girl),
Carrie