So my epidural started working properly and they gave me a magic button, or a bolus that would give me a special extra shot of epidural if I needed it. I commanded people to push the button regularly and even had Seth figure out what the lock out time was until I could push it again. Especially when I could still feel the contractions on one side of my body.
I started to feel like I was ready to start pushing. I remember thinking that when people would tell me that I would NEVER be a person who wanted to feel like I needed to push. But it does happen. All of the sudden you feel like you just need to push, it's the strangest feeling.
So we call in the nurse and she says that as soon as the doctors are done down the hall they will come in and check me. Then she left because apparently the woman down the hall had a four headed baby or something because no one came back for a really long time. Later I found out that my nurse was doing a technique called "Laboring down" which meant instead of making me push for three hours, she just let the baby come down and make her way down herself. By the time everyone came back, they had my normal doctor, Dr. Carlson with them, who just happened to stop up on her way to a lecture to see how I was doing. She checked me and told them to call down and cancel her lecture because I was ready to go. They brought in the "stork nurse" which is the lady who takes Evelynn after she is born and cleans her up.
They took my epidural away, which prompted the response of "WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN GIVE YOU THE BUTTON?!?!?" and then Kim told me to trust her and I did. Then my mom grabbed one leg and Kim grabbed the other, Seth stayed up at my head like I ordered him too, and my dad stayed far away by the "french fry warmer" where they would take Evelynn and clean her up and he would take lots of pictures.
So I pushed. Really I thought it would be the worst part of the whole shebang, but actually, it felt like a relief. Like I knew the end was coming. All I had to do was hold my breath and push when they told me to. I tried to picture myself on a beach in Mexico and whenever the waves came crashing forward that's when I would push. I remember scoffing at the thought of suggested imagery when they were trying to teach it in Childbirth Class, but honestly, it helped. I just closed my eyes and pushed as hard as I could. After about an hour of pushing, she was out. I didn't have any tearing or anything. It was actually pretty smoothing sailing. The nurses and Dr. Carlson joked because she kicked all the way out and she hiccuped. The nurses and Dr. Carlson said that they had never seen a baby hiccup out of the womb before. Then they told me to stop pushing. I was so relieved. When she came out she gave a tiny little cry, I didn't look at her because well, ew. Seth cut the cord and was horribly scarred for life. Apparently everything I had been trying to avoid he saw in full force when he went down to cut the cord.
I remember Kim telling me we need a lot of good strong cries. That was a good sign. Evie mostly wimpered. Dr. Carlson told the stork nurse there was mechonium which is baby poop. I remember thinking, where are her cries. Next thing I know, they are telling Seth that they are taking Evie into the side room to do more suction because she is "floppy". During the tour we took, they told us that they only take babies out of your room and into the side room if something is wrong. The nurses and Dr. kept telling me it was fine she must have just inhaled some of the mechonium when she was hiccuping on her way out. I knew they were lying. Dr. Carlson delivered my placenta which I didn't feel at all, but it made the sickest noise EVER when it hit the basin. My mom went to see Evelynn in the side room because I started freaking out about it. Seth was already in there. Kim and Dr. Carlson cleaned me up and then basically the worst four days of my life started.
They came out with Seth and my Mom and told me that they had to take Evie up to the NICU immediately. They were going to try and wheel her out so I could see her because I couldn't see her, but they couldn't get the incubator out of the door. My Dad and Seth went with her to the NICU and my Mom stayed with me. I didn't even get to see her, and I wouldn't see her for another six hours. Because I was still on the magnesium drip for my high blood pressure and I still had the epidural in I couldn't go anywhere. I would actually have the magnesium in for 24 hours. I basically spent the next couple hours crying and trying to get information on Evelynn.
They took her down to the NICU and put her on something called a CPAP because she wasn't breathing well. They were concerned that she inhaled baby poop into her lungs so she was also getting lots of tests and a full course of antibiotics done. By the time they got my epidural out and got me wheeled down to her she looked pretty pathetic. At this point I was just glad to see her, all I had seen was the couple of pictures my Dad took before they took her away. The NICU was very far away from my room and I had to have someone and a nurse wheel me down there because of all the stuff I was hooked up to. I'd like to tell you about the pain and all the aftermath stuff, but I really can't because I don't remember any of it. All I remember is worrying and crying about the fact that my little girl, the one I suffered thru pregnancy for, suffered thru infertility for, was told I wasn't going to have, was in the NICU and I couldn't hold her.
So that pretty much sucked. On top of that, we had all these people and all these family members and visitors who showed up to see her and me and all I wanted to do was be with my family and Seth and get thru this horrible NICU bullshit.
So my next post will be all about our NICU experience which, for what a horrible position we were in, the people at the UNMC NICU are AMAZING. I can't sing their praises enough.
Here are some pictures of Evelynn:
In what Seth called "the french fry warmer" after she was born
Getting cleaned up and trying to get her to breath better.
Getting weighed before headed to the NICU
In the NICU, this is after they took the CPAP off, it was this scary thing that covered her face and went up her nose. No one took pictures of that, that was sad.
In her incubator
More incubator shots
Visiting in my sweet ride, see all the stuff I'm hooked up to, I'm also faking this smile hard core. My brother Jesse is behind me. He pushed me back and forth to the NICU about a dozen times over the next couple days. What a good brother.
Seth learning how to change a diaper in the incubator. Preemie diapers, she is still in those.
Seth taking Evelynn's temp. That is Amy our favorite NICU nurse, she taught us so much and reassured us so much. We LOVE HER!
Love (that I have such a great family),
Carrie
That all sounds pretty scary. I'm glad that Evelynn's okay!
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