Baby Come Back! Any kind of fool could see...THAT YOU SHOULD NOT LEAVE CARRIE ALONE FOR THE DAY.

The clock is making me crabby.
It has seemingly stopped and is holding me hostage here at work when all I want to do is go home, take off my bad idea outfit for the day and watch tv and eat some enchi’s.
I am very bored, and lonely. My usual entertainment (my friends who email me all day) have seemingly DROPPED OFF THE FACE OF THE PLANET OR BROKEN THEIR FINGERS IN A TRAGIC CAR DOOR ACCIDENT. Or forgotten about me. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve gotten a couple of responses, sporadically here and there. Some are forgiven, they have actual jobs, but ONE OF YOU I know is HOME and is all comfy on your couch watching TV and is ABOUT TO GET A PHONE CALL begging you to come back and chat with me. FOR THE SAKE OF THE WORLD. Or my sanity, which ever is more important to you-PAMELA. Even my husband is giving me the one to three word responses today. And I am sending long heart-filled rambly emails blubbering over my apparently lack in email popularity today. (Carrie is needy and paranoid-for those of you who do NOT know her that well…)
Kathy is getting a dog-I learned that from email. He is cute as can be and he is from Kansas. They get him in three weeks. The name is still being debated. I did get that news today. L’ara is getting new carpet (jealous!) and Pam and I are planning a party (that stopped being planned at 10 am this morning…)
Oh? What’s that? You want to hear about the bad idea outfit?? Sure, I’ve got nothing BETTER to do…
So today-in a coup de triumph of bad outfits, I wore a fake white fur lined cuffs and hood sweater my GRANDMA got me because I saw it in the back of my closet and thought-“Yesterday I sweat to death because my sweater was to thick, I will wear this sweater because it is thinner and I can take it off it gets too hot. And I will be smart enough NOT to wear an inappropriate tee shirt underneath it.” HAHA! Then I wore some pants I found on the floor. And my pink “BOOTS WIT DA FUR” hoping the whole NPP would be looking ME. Well I got to work and noticed that the fur was making me sneezy, but then I took off the sweater-as brilliantly planned and my dark blue tee shirt underneath looked like what can only be described as “Carrie lost a fight with a polar bear who had just rolled in a lint trap”. And the pants. Lo, friends, the pants. This is where I go into a digression.
I have recently lost a little weight. Okay a lot of weight, considering I was 140 in Sioux Falls. I’m not sure where the logic is in it. Seth says I learned portion control (which was NOT APPARENT LAST NIGHT WITH THE ALL YOU CAN EAT FRIES). I was exercising in Sioux Falls-REGULARLY!! No really-ask my personal trainer-he MADE me go, and if I did not he gave me this HUGE guilt trip and then would be gone from the apartment long enough that I would get lonely and bored. It was an evil trick because the next time he offered I said YES because I could not stand the lonely and bored and scary apartment noises. And then he made promises about my wedding dress and me looking stunning in it and him crying when I came down the aisle because I was so stunning (he did and I was-I have video proof). Tricky personal trainer/husband.
Anyway I continued to gain weight even while working out regularly. And controlling portions. Still tipping at 140.
Then I moved back to Omaha, promptly stopped working out and started a high stress job that brought me lunch from divine places sometimes (thanks Annie!) and planning a HIGHER THEN ON RECORD STRESS wedding. And magically-I lost 20 pounds. I’m pretty sure it was overnight.
In fat times, I had to upgrade all my jeans. I’m a jean FREAK, I own tons, ask my Dad or brother or Seth, they’ve carried the boxes. I bought cool chic jeans to make me feel better about my ever expanding backside. I thought, well its 2 sizes bigger-BUT IT’S SPARKLY!!!
I’m still wearing the Fat Jeans. (end digression)
And these jeans are the ones I picked up this morning from the floor.
I don’t know why I don’t get new jeans (*little voice* yes you do, because you want cooler things like flat screen tv’s and a steam cleaner and to EAT OUT and have your car paid off AND you feel good when your jeans aren’t strangling your Lady Parts) and I know why I don’t go back to the old ones-they are outdated and childish-some of them are LACE UP and have FLAME stitching and words like “Angel” stitched across my then tiny rear (*little voice* and you are afraid that you won’t fit back into them and the jeans you are wearing now are just stretched out and you are lying to yourself about your dramatic weight loss with no diet or exercise and you secretly suspect Seth of breaking the scale because he leaves his HEAVY FITNESS MAGAZINES (90% ads) on it all the time). So I’m constantly pulling my jeans up or trying to cover my exposed crack from hanging out the backside. Today I stepped on them and almost pulled them down to my thighs, thank GOD I was in the bathroom. I’m walking VERY carefully right now…
OH AND! AND! The jeans have a salt snow stain on them because they are the ones I wore last night to eat dinner with Pam and Jason. I noticed, as hurriedly tried not to fall into a bathroom stall. So that makes the bad idea outfit even better.
End story.
Have I mentioned that I’m bored and lonely today?
I actually did do lots of work, but I tend to have this pattern of work, email, work, email work. It gives me a nice flow. But when the email is cut out, I stare at the little icon at the bottom of the screen longingly and try and will an email to come to me. I think of witty things to say to people and by the time they do email me, I’ve forgotten it. I hate that. I take prolonged bathroom breaks because my mom has this theory that if your food takes forever in a restaurant just take a bathroom break and it will come, and it usually WORKS, so I applied that to emailing only to rush back to my computer after moseying around the office to see NO EMAILS or one email from Seth that says “Are you sure we need this now?” in reference to my MASSIVE research project of the best steam cleaner on the market.
*deep sigh*
I guess I’ll go spend the next 45 minutes reading Joshilyn Jackson’s blog…
Oh wait, first I will be horribly embarrassed when someone tells me that a patch of my underwear keeps creeping up...GREAT thanks for STALKING MY UNDERWEAR LINE TODAY. Okay it's official, I need to dig those jeans out...
Hope tomorrow goes faster!!
Love to you all!

PS-The sweater my grandma got me is actually really nice, it's very Russian, but I forgot it makes me sneezy which is why it was at the back of my closet...not because it was unbearably ugly or anything...