First I’d like to point out that guest blogging makes me feel cool and pseudo-celebrity-ish. I hope more people read this blog than me.. and Carrie. I was reading my comrades first post, and I couldn’t help but notice that she said I will give relationship advice *cue Alanis’ Ironic*
I can dispense the best relationship advice, mostly because I’m probably the biggest relationship loser I know, so I have a whole healthy list of things one should NEVER do. Seemingly unimportant things can really make or break, trust.
I’m currently involved in a relationship. A very new, very intense relationship. We are still in that part where we are blissfully unaware of each other’s fault. Scratch that, we are still so new we are blissfully unaware the other even HAS faults. It’s glorious. Angels still sing for him whenever I enter a room.. or it could just be me. Like a chorus of tone deaf angels… A lot of times when I think I’m singing in my head, it’s actually out loud. Ask my coworkers, but I digress. You get the point, we’re happy.
So why ruin all that good happy? Because that’s what I do, I’m a happy killer. I decided it was time for us to compile “the List”. What’s a better way to bond with your new boyfriend than to make a list of people you are allowed to cheat on them with right? A list of people you find hotter and more desirable than your significant other? So I had my list.. my very long list. Your typical Justin Timberlakes, your David Beckhams, your Johnny Depps, your Wentworth Millers (yes I know he’s gay, but this is a hypothetical, fantasy list, and in my fantasy I have the power to make him straight), your Peyton Mannings, your Brett Favres, your Simon Bakers, your Eds from Extreme Home Makeover, your Dr. McDreamys, your Dr. McSteamys.. You get the point, the list is long. I should have known I was in trouble when after 20 minutes I was still listing and he could only come up with two people. Well I decided to add a certain person to my list that I actually know. I didn’t know you couldn’t do that. Well based on my love bug’s (yes we are so new we still call each other ridiculous names) reaction, this isn’t something that is allowed. Who knew? Oh EVERYONE knows you aren’t allowed to do that? Could have told this chick.
No angels sang that day when I entered room, I can promise you that. And now, he realizes that I snore.
How come my list is exactly like your list-down to the WENTWORTH MILLER and ED from Extreme Makeover-we've never even talked about Ed together before! Soulles!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your first blog! I LOVED it! It puts my first blog to shame, all organized and thougthful. :-)